New Year's Eve Conversation Starters: 40 Questions That Skip the Resolution Talk

Quick answer: what to talk about on New Year's Eve

Skip "So, what's your resolution?" Most people do not have one. In a YouGov survey from October 2026, only 23% of U.S. adults said they had made any resolution or goal for 2026. Ask two easier questions instead:

1. One small thing from the year that is ending. "What is a small thing from this year you would happily do again?"
2. One open door into the next. "What do you want more of next year?"

The first is light enough for a stranger and still works for someone who had a hard year. The second lets people talk about plans without being graded on them. Follow up on whatever they say, and you have a conversation.

We call this Small Back, Open Ahead. Below you will find 40 questions sorted by who you are with, a swap table for the questions that usually fall flat, what to say in the last ten minutes before midnight, three worked conversations, what to say when you are back at work in January, and a five-minute drill.

Why the usual New Year questions fall flat

The two questions everyone asks on December 31 are "What's your resolution?" and "How was your year?" Both sound friendly. Both often land badly.

Most people have no resolution to report. In that YouGov survey (1,053 U.S. adults, October 2-5, 2026), 77% said they had not made any resolution or goal for 2026. Asking someone for their resolution puts three out of four people on the spot, and the answer is usually an apologetic "Not really, no."

Many people did not have a good year. The same survey asked how 2026 had been for people personally. 7% said great and 24% good, 40% said OK, 16% said bad and 11% said terrible. So "How was your year?" asks more than a quarter of the room to either lie or overshare to someone holding a party hat.

People quietly assume everyone else has failed. Among the people who had made a resolution, 65% said they had stuck to it entirely or mostly. But when YouGov asked the whole sample about resolution-makers in general, 64% thought they had mostly or entirely given up. These are self-reports, so take the first number with some salt. Still, it is a good reason to drop the "So, quit the gym yet?" joke. The person you are joking with may be quietly proud of how it is going.

The Small Back, Open Ahead rule

This is our own rule of thumb, not a tested method. It is built from a few findings that point the same way.

Small back: ask about one ordinary moment, not the whole year

"What was the best part of your year?" asks for a ranking. "What is a small thing from this year you would happily do again?" asks for a memory. The second is easier to answer and works whether the year went well or not.

There is a reason to think the small stuff is more fun than it sounds. In four studies, Ting Zhang, Tami Kim, Alison Wood Brooks, Francesca Gino and Michael Norton found that people underestimate how interesting it will be to rediscover ordinary moments from their past. They underestimated this most for "ordinary, mundane experiences", as opposed to extraordinary ones. A good New Year question does the same job as their time capsules: it hands someone back a small, forgotten piece of their year.

Open ahead: ask what they want more of, not what they will fix

"What do you want more of next year?" invites someone to add something to their life. "What are you giving up?" invites them to talk about a flaw.

That difference matters for the goals themselves, too. In a 2020 study, Martin Oscarsson, Per Carlbring, Gerhard Andersson and Alexander Rozental followed 1,066 people for a year after New Year. People with "approach" goals, such as starting a habit, were more successful than those with "avoidance" goals, such as quitting one: 58.9% against 47.1%. Overall, 55% of those who answered at the one-year follow-up said they had kept their resolution. So asking "What do you want to start?" is not only nicer small talk. It nudges people toward the kind of goal that works better.

The new year itself also helps. Hengchen Dai, Katherine Milkman and Jason Riis called it the "fresh start effect": Google searches for "diet", gym visits and commitments to pursue goals all rise after landmarks like a new year, a new month or a birthday. People really are thinking about what comes next on December 31. You are just giving them a friendly way to say it out loud.

Then: one follow-up

Whatever they say, ask one question about it. In three studies of live conversations, Karen Huang and colleagues found that people who asked more questions, "particularly follow-up questions", were better liked. If someone says "more swimming", ask "Where do you swim?" and not "Cool, I want to read more."

40 New Year's Eve conversation starters, by who you are with

A question that works on a friend of ten years will feel strange to a stranger by the coat rack. Pick the group that matches the person in front of you.

With people you just met at a party

Keep these light, and about tonight or small things. You can go deeper later if it clicks.

• "How do you know the host? I am Sam, I know them from climbing."
• "Are you a midnight person, or is this a heroic effort?"
• "What is the best New Year's Eve you have ever had?"
• "What does New Year usually look like for you? Any family traditions?"
• "Where would you be tonight if you could teleport anywhere?"
• "What is a small thing from this year you would happily do again?"
• "Did you discover anything good this year? A show, a place, a recipe?"
• "What is the most useful thing you learned this year that nobody taught you at school?"
• "What do you want more of next year?"
• "Is there anything you are looking forward to in January? Anything at all counts."

With friends you know well

This is the place for the deeper questions. Most people expect a deep question to feel awkward, but in a series of experiments, Michael Kardas, Amit Kumar and Nicholas Epley found that deep conversations between strangers felt less awkward and more connecting than people predicted, because people expected others to care less than they did. With friends, the risk is even lower.

• "What surprised you about this year?"
• "When did you feel most like yourself this year?"
• "What is something you changed your mind about?"
• "Which person did you get closer to this year?"
• "What is one thing you are quietly proud of that nobody really noticed?"
• "What did you stop doing this year, and do you miss it?"
• "What is a risk you are glad you took, or wish you had?"
• "If this year were a book chapter, what would the chapter be called?"
• "What would make next year a good one, even if nothing big happens?"
• "What is one thing I could do next year to be a better friend to you?"

With family at home

Mix ages. Give kids the silly ones first, so they stay at the table for the rest.

• "What was the funniest thing that happened in this house this year?"
• "What is one thing you can do now that you could not do last New Year?"
• "Grandma, what did New Year's Eve look like when you were young?"
• "Which family tradition would you keep forever, and which one could we retire?"
• "If our family had a theme song for this year, what would it be?"
• "Who here changed the most this year, and how?"
• "What is one place you want us to go together next year?"
• "What is something small someone at this table did this year that helped you?"
• "Kids, if you were in charge of next year, what would be the first new rule?"
• "What should we do again next New Year's Eve?"

With a date or a partner

On an early date, stay with the light questions and lean on curiosity. With a long-term partner, you can look back together.

• "What is your favorite memory of us from this year?" (partner)
• "What is something you want us to try for the first time next year?" (partner)
• "What did I do this year that you liked and maybe never told me?" (partner)
• "What is one thing that would make next year easier for you, and how can I help?" (partner)
• "What does your ideal New Year's Day look like?" (date or partner)
• "Are you a big-party person, or a small-dinner person, for nights like this?" (date)
• "What is the best thing you ate this year?" (date)
• "What are you most looking forward to in the next few months?" (date)
• "Is there a tradition from your family you like on New Year?" (date)
• "What is a small thing that made you happy this week?" (date or partner)

For a first date that happens to fall on New Year's week, our guide to first-date conversation starters that do not feel forced has more.

The swap table: what to ask instead

Instead of	Try	Why it works better
"What's your resolution?"	"What do you want more of next year?"	Most people have no resolution. Everyone can name something they want more of.
"How was your year?"	"What is a small thing from this year you would happily do again?"	It works after a good or a bad year, and asks for a memory, not a verdict.
"Did you keep last year's resolution?"	"Did anything from last January actually stick?"	It invites a small win, not a confession.
"So, quit the gym yet?"	"How is the swimming going? Where do you go?"	Many people who made resolutions say they are sticking with them. Assume the best.
"What are you giving up?"	"What do you want to start?"	Approach goals ("start") did better than avoidance goals ("quit") in a large study.
"Big plans for next year?"	"Anything you are looking forward to in January? Anything counts."	"Big plans" pressures people. "Anything counts" lets a small answer feel enough.
"What did you do this year?"	"Did you discover anything good this year? A show, a place, a recipe?"	It gives three easy doors, and everyone has walked through at least one.

The last ten minutes before midnight

The countdown is the one moment of the night where everyone is waiting for the same thing. It is the easiest time to talk to someone you have not met.

• Name the moment. "Ten minutes to go. Are you a countdown-out-loud person?"
• Introduce yourself if you have not. "I just realized we have talked for twenty minutes and I never said, I am Alex." Before midnight is the natural time to catch up on names.
• Ask the one-word question. "If you had to sum up this year in one word, what would it be?" It is fast, and the word usually invites a follow-up.
• After midnight, keep it simple. "Happy New Year!" and a warm smile is enough. With people you have just met, a handshake, a raised glass or a wave is fine. Hugs and kisses are for people who clearly want them. If you are not sure, go for the glass.
• Then give people room. For a few minutes after midnight, people want to find their partner, call their family or text a friend. "I am going to call my sister, happy New Year!" is a perfectly good way to step away.

Three worked conversations

These are hypothetical scenes, written to show the rhythm. Notice how each one gets from the opener to a real exchange with one follow-up.

A stranger in the kitchen at 11:40. You are both waiting for the ice tray to refill.

You: "How do you know Priya? I am Jonas, we work together."

Them: "We were flatmates at university. I am Lena."

You: "Ha, so you know all the stories. Are you a midnight person, or is this a heroic effort?"

Lena: "Heroic effort. I am usually asleep by ten."

You: "Same. What would you normally be doing tonight?"

Lena: "Board games with my brother's kids. Honestly I would rather be there."

You: "What is the game?"

Lena: (five minutes about a game called Dixit, and her nephew cheating)

Jonas never asked about a resolution or a job. He asked about tonight, then followed the one detail Lena offered.

A friend who had a hard year. You know your friend Marco lost his job in the spring.

You: "I am not doing the big 'how was your year' thing. What is a small thing from this year you would happily do again?"

Marco: "Honestly, the walks. When I was out of work I walked every morning."

You: "Where did you go?"

Marco: "Along the canal. There is a heron there every day. I have started to think of him as a colleague."

You: "Does the heron have a name?"

Marco: "Gerald."

You: "What do you want more of next year?"

Marco: "Gerald, probably. And a job I like as much as those walks."

The question let Marco choose how much of the hard part to share. He chose a heron, and then got to the real thing on his own.

The first morning back at work. It is January 5 and you meet a colleague at the coffee machine.

Them: "Happy New Year! How were the holidays?"

You: "Really nice, thanks. Quiet. I finally learned to make bread, and only burned two loaves. How about you, did you go anywhere?"

Them: "My parents' place, so the usual chaos."

You: "What is the usual chaos? Big family?"

One true detail, then a question back. More on this below.

Back at work in January: what to say

The first week of January brings its own small talk, and it repeats twenty times a day.

Answering "How were the holidays?"

Give one detail and hand the question back. That is the whole formula.

How it really went	A line you can say
Great	"Really good, thanks. We went skiing and nobody broke anything. Did you get away?"
Fine, nothing special	"Quiet, which was exactly what I needed. I mostly read and ate. How about you?"
Busy with family	"Full on. Fourteen people at my parents' place. Did you have a quiet one or a loud one?"
Hard, and you do not want to talk about it	"Mixed, honestly, but I am glad to be back. How was yours?"
You worked through it	"I was on call, so I am saving my break for February. Did you get some time off?"

The "hard" row matters. You do not owe a colleague the full story. "Mixed, honestly" is true, it is enough, and most people will move on kindly.

How long can you say "Happy New Year"?

One reader on Interpersonal Skills Stack Exchange described this exact office debate: on the first day back, some colleagues stopped saying it after January 2 and were called cold, others kept going for weeks and were called annoying. There is no official rule, and customs vary by country.

Our rule of thumb: say it the first time you see someone in the new year, through roughly the middle of January. After that, swap it for "How has your January been?" It keeps the warmth without sounding like you missed the memo.

Asking about someone's resolution at work

Another Stack Exchange asker wanted to use their coworkers' New Year diets as small talk, but worried it was sensitive. It can be. Weight, money and health are personal, and the person may not want the office tracking their progress.

So let them bring it up. Ask an open question, like "Anything new you are trying this year?", and if they mention a diet or a savings plan, ask about the part they seem excited about ("What are you cooking?") rather than the results ("How much have you lost?").

January networking events

January events are easier than most, because everyone has the same opener available. "What are you looking forward to at work this year?" is warmer than "What do you do?", and it gives the other person room to talk about plans instead of reciting a job title. For the rest of the evening, our guide to networking without sounding transactional covers what comes next.

If you are the one who had a bad year

You do not have to perform a good year at a party. A few honest, light lines:

• "It was a tough one, so I am really ready for a fresh page. What about you?"
• "Let's just say I am glad it is ending. What is the best thing you ate tonight?"
• "Not my favorite year, but I had some great walks. Do you have a thing that kept you going?"

Each one is true, closes the topic gently, and hands the conversation back. If someone pushes, "Another time, maybe. Tonight I am here for the snacks" is a complete answer.

Bring one small story

The easiest way to have something to say all night is to bring one short story from your year that has nothing to do with work: something you learned, a place you went, a thing that went wrong in a funny way. Told in under a minute, it answers half the questions on this page. If you would like a few ideas, NerdSip, a learning app made by ai51, the company that publishes this site, keeps a list of cool stories and facts to tell at parties. For how to tell any story so it lands, see how to tell better everyday stories.

When to move on, and when to go home

New Year's Eve is long, and many conversations at parties run past the point where both people wanted to stop. In a 2021 study of 932 conversations, Adam Mastroianni and colleagues found that conversations almost never ended when both people wanted them to, and that people had little idea when their partner wanted to stop. If you are wondering whether it is time to move on, the other person may well be wondering too. "I am going to find the snacks before midnight, really good to meet you" is plenty. Our guide to leaving a conversation politely has more lines.

And when you get home, there is one more finding worth knowing. After a conversation, people tend to underestimate how much the other person liked them. Erica Boothby and colleagues called it "the liking gap". So if you replay the night at 2 a.m., give yourself the benefit of the doubt.

A five-minute drill before the party

Do this on the way there.

1. Pick your two questions. One Small Back ("a small thing from this year you would do again") and one Open Ahead ("what do you want more of"). Say them out loud once.
2. Answer them yourself. People will ask you back. Have one small memory and one "more of" ready.
3. Choose your story. One non-work moment from your year, under a minute.
4. Choose your midnight line. "Ten minutes to go. Are you a countdown-out-loud person?"
5. Choose your exit line, and decide when you are allowed to go home. Then stop checking the clock.

If you get nervous before parties in general, our five-minute routine before a date, meeting or party covers the warm-up. Going to a party where you only know the host? Start with what to say at a party where you know one person.

The one thing to remember

Do not grade anyone's year, and do not ask for a resolution. Ask for one small thing they would do again and one thing they want more of, then follow up on whatever they say. That is enough to carry you from the coat rack to midnight, and back to the coffee machine in January.

Still in the middle of the holiday season? See our guides to office holiday party small talk and what to talk about at Thanksgiving instead of politics.